March 3, 2020
This is the beginning of all the rest of my work. I have the feeling that one year of meditation opened something up in my brain. As if the joyful little child in me woke up.
For me it is a very intuitive way to make work. I just follow my impulses as if I am a kid. Spontaneous ideas I try, following my feeling, not my aesthetic eye or rational brain. I assume I am in search of a piece of ‘free will’ while ignoring the rules of our today’s society. Just focus on being happy and fulfilled on the inside. And off course sometimes, when it really feels shitty what I created, I just behave like a little kid and tear it apart and throw it away. Such relief.
The funny thing is that putting your pen in the pot of ink and then making dots until the ink is finished kind of enfolds into a repeating pattern. Just like how our brain works. You learn something new, you do it often enough and in the end the new ‘pattern’ turns into an ‘automatic’ action. You don’t have to think about it, while doing so. For example doing the dishes, taking a shower, driving a car, water your plants, brush your teeth, etc. etc. While doing it, you can think about other stuff, for example your planning, or your upcoming appointment.
Every new piece of paper for me is a challenge to try to do something new again. Although I did find out that my brain wants to repeat the stuff I did before. So how to prevent that? Just stay curious and start playing. Trial and error and here and there I check in with my body to see how it feels and try something new again.